The Dress Code is - Flak Jackets for Brazilians

Hiya,

instead of recipes, as I promised when I started the blog, I'm going to occasionally throw in a series of restaurant reviews. Obviously, to tie in with the post above, I've picked locations where you are least likely to be hassled by the filth.



Above: Avoid McDonalds at all costs - it really cuts into your protester credibility.

Breakfast:

Roast - Roast is an absolutely amazing restaurant situated over Borough market, just near London Bridge Station. The whole menu is incredible - picked freshly from the market, no less - but I particularly want to flag up their incredible breakfasts.

Between 7 and 8 am, they do a breakfast for two for £15. This is incredible value; both myself and the ladyfriend were unable to finish the wonderfully presented full English breakfast we had. For a good breakfast in Central London, £7.50 a head is a steal, particularly in contrast with hotel breakfasts.

Perfect for building up your strength before being kettled all day.


Lunch

I'd recommend Menula, a fantastic Sicilian restaurant on Charlotte St. Why? Well, have a look at the disclaimer on the bottom of their menu...



Yes, it says "Please note healthy options are available - please ask to see the manager". In other words, they have an absolutely no holds barred approach to Italian cooking. Healthy, it is not. Splendidly cooked, with wonderful service, it absolutely is. In particular, the seafood is spectacular.

If you're taking your life in your hands, why worry about eating healthily? At any moment the Met might beat you to death or shoot you.

Dinner

For a reasonably priced meal out in London, you cannot go wrong with Studio 6 on Gabriel's Wharf, near Waterloo station.

Despite the slightly shabby state of the building, the food & service are outstanding. On a sunny day, the terrace outside is beautiful to sit at and watch the world go by.

However, the area it really excels in is price. All of the main courses are under £10; you get literally some of the best food in London for not much more than you'd pay for a Whopper meal at Burger King.

It's a great first date venue; perfect for taking that special girl you just met while shouting "Nazi punks, Nazi Punks, Fuck off!"...

Strange Days

We live in a pretty odd time, don't we?

To Kill a Mockingbird is under attack by leading thinkers for being racist, at the same time that Atlas Shrugged enjoys record sales levels. Black is white, white is black.

The other day, a Tory Minister for Justice declared that we lock up far too many people, at the same time that his Labour opposite number appeared in the Daily Mail to say that Prison works perfectly and he proved it. So, right is now left.

The most popular toy for Christmas this year isn't anything real - not like the Action men I played with as a kid, or anything wholly fictional, like the Transformers - it's a Postmodern pastiche of what Toys are like, Jetpack Buzz Lightyear. At the same time, an artist has hung a fighter jet in an Art Gallery and said "It's Art", taking the concept of the readymade to a new extreme. So, art is becoming life and life is art.

All of this stuff, this contradiction, absolutely blows my mind but simultaneously seems totally normal. In some ways, this blog is about contradiction. For a long time, I've described myself as a feminist, multi-culturalist, liberal Tory. I feel myself getting pulled this way and that way by beliefs that I hold to be completely coherent.

In the last week, I've been accused of "being far too left wing to be a Tory" by a Intellectual Property Lawyer, and simultaneously "so right wing you're actually, definably evil" by a Genealogist, for expressing the same view.

So, I guess this blog is going to be about my political beliefs, and why they make sense. It's also going to be a way for me to regularly comment on the political happenings of the day. Oh, and there will be cooking & restaurant reviews too. Hence the strapline.

What? Cooking!? Well, partly it's to emphasise the contradictory nature of the blog - you might look on here for a passionate rant about why feminism is great (written by me, a man), only to find a recipe for Chocolate cake. Of course, real feminists won't mind, because all girls love Chocolate Cake. (This is a joke)

I suppose there's only one question left to answer: Why is the blog called Hemingway & Orwell's kitchen?

Well, first off, Hemingway & Orwell are my two favourite writers. One was a macho man's man, who loved hunting, shooting, and himself - the other a sensitive, urbane consumptive, who feared & cared for the whole of society. Orwell died from his lungs giving out at 46, surrounded by his friends and family - Hemingway died alone, by shooting himself with an elephant gun so spectacularly powerful his teeth were found stuck in a ceiling three floor up from the room he did it in. More contradictions.

But there were fascinating parallels, too. Both hated fascism before it became fashionable to do so; Hemingway covered the Spanish civil war Orwell fought in. Both were poor in Paris in the 1920s; Orwell's idea of poverty was having to sell his clothes so he and his starving Russian emigre housemate could buy a loaf of bread, while Hemingway's was being so poor he could only afford cheap wine & had to share car journeys with F.Scott Fitzgerald. Both wrote by having adventures and then writing down what happened. Both loved clarity of language.

I admire them both, suffice to say. I guess I'm writing what I hope they'd enjoy reading (1). And I hope you enjoy it too.



1.) Although, I suspect Hemingway would consider my environmentalism & commitment to feminism deeply unmanly, and probably shoot me, while Orwell would probably hate me for my reactionary views, and make cutting comments about me to Evelyn Waugh at swish parties. Sigh, I just can't win, can I?